Monday, 8 September 2014

Crumbs of Comfort

Summer's lease is over
The holidaymakers have returned to Dover
Children trudge back to school
MPs resume playing the fool

Like these biscuits
Summer crumbles to dust
and our bank accounts
are empty and bust

As stumps are drawn
And old cricketers retired
Football fans flock to the terraces
Whilst managers are hired and fired
And the transfer window closes
As petals fall from the roses

We look both back and forward in September
A time to prepare and remember
Yet life is what happens
When you're busy making a plan
So lose the calendar and pens
And enjoy this Indian Summer while you still can

Biscuit: Prinzen Rolle Mehrkorn
Taste test: 8.5 out of 10
Cost: Gift from Jo's holiday on Sylt - a German Island

Sunday, 3 August 2014

Cameron Highland Cookies

Commonwealth Cami’s Cameron Cookies
Originate from
Malaysia where
Magnificent monkeys and magnesium,
Orange orang-utans too
Now ski and swim the cool blue
Water which covers three quarters of the
Earth’s surface, but not
Australia, the country that now
Leads and tops
The Games table, not quite in the

Highlands of Scotland.

Biscuit: Mum's Bake Cookies
Taste test: 7 out of 10
Cost: Gift from Cami's honeymoon in Malaysia

Wednesday, 9 July 2014

Pairing Up

The matrimonial merge of pink 'n white
in a biscuit with marshmallow
is a brilliant bite
like fish 'n chips
tasty to swallow

Coupled with bread 'n butter
me 'n you lot and lots for us to chew
ascending the apples 'n pears
hearts a flutter
serenading each other with rhythm 'n blues

This poem is dedicated to Cami who just got officially paired up.

Biscuit: Pink 'N' Whites by Caxton
Taste test: 8 out of 10
Cost: 99p from Lidl

Tuesday, 24 June 2014

There was a young man from Costa Rica.....

There was a young man from Costa Rica,
who lost his heart to a streaker,
he took his eye off the ball,
which was a very bad call,
as he was their national keeper.

Biscuit: Delizie
Taste test: 7.5 out of 10
Cost: A gift from Vicky and Anita from Lidl

Wednesday, 18 June 2014

Have some free advice Roy

So on Thursday it's Uruguay,
the nation lets out a collective sigh,
Come on England we need to win,
or St George's flag will end up in the bin.

Lambert, Lallana and Shaw are our new saints,
put them in the team Roy and there'll be no complaints.
Return Rooney to centre forward - the right place,
then you'll have a team that won't disgrace.

Let the fans eat biscuit hat tricks,
to inspire Sturridge to score goals quick.
Coleen, Wag Queen, will arrive today,
her presence will raise Wayne's state of play.

Just six more games 'til we raise the cup,
winning smiles, champagne to sup,
C'mon three lions keep the vision alive,
defeat Uruguay, let hope survive.

Biscuit: Fox's Party Footballs
Taste test: 9 out of 10
Cost: Found them on the bus.

Wednesday, 11 June 2014

A Biscuit Poetry Performance

Come and see us perform this Saturday 14th June upstairs at the Art House in Southampton at the RejectorSlip Poetry Festival.

Terry, Gary, Lee, Olly, Karl, Shan,Vicky and Jo will be taking the stage at 4:30pm for a half an hour slot of magical poems inspired guessed it......biscuits!

We hope to see you there.

Address: The Art House, 178 Above Bar Street, Southampton, SO14 7DW

Monday, 9 June 2014


This week’s biscuit comes from Jo.
Strangely, it’s called Polo.
Wrapped in green and white and gold,
colours of Ireland, young and old.

By Jacobs of Dublin they’re made
where Molly Malone plied her trade.
As hard as sham rock, dry as bone,
a chip off the old Blarney Stone.

Don’t be confused by the name.
A Polo mint is not the same.
This is not a shirt you can wear
or a frozen, Arctic bear.

It’s not named for a famous Venetian
traveller with his camel train.
Princes don’t play this on horseback
nor is it a small German hatchback.

Sadly, Polo lacks that sweet zest
of Ireland at its green and friendly best.
As one is enough, rather than Polo

perhaps this cookie’s title should be Solo.

Biscuit: Jacob's Solo
Taste test: 4 out of 10
Cost: A gift from Ireland - less than a euro.