Heat Me, Eat Me, CHEAT ME cookies

To be frank we're incensed
these biscuits are shrouded in pretence
yes they emancipate the kitchen worker
yet discourage baking and promote the shirker
this half baked idea clouds supermarkets with shame
a crass time saving effort so hopelessly lame
unlike the sad substitute discussed above
a just baked warm cookie is a labour of love
life is accelerating we need it to slow
wake up Tesco and smell the fresh cookie dough

Biscuit: Hazlenut Heat Me, Eat Me Cookies

Taste test: 4 out of 10
Cost: £1 from Tesco in New Milton

Un Macaronic Biscuit Mash Up

Le petit beurre
French nom de guerre
their ubiquitous biscuit
take a bite and risk it
a buttery sensation
of gallic persuasion
compliments cafe au lait
avec du sucre s'il vous plait
une grande tradition
now we need l'addition
could have been a solution
to the French Revolution
if Marie Antoinette had said
"let them eat biscuits" instead.

Biscuit: Le Petit Beurre

Taste test: 9.7 out of 10
Cost: A gift from Peter from France :)

Biscuit Poetry hits the Ejector Seat Festival!

We are all of a dither at Headway this week as our big moment approaches. Saturday will see Karl, Terry, Shan, Lee, Olly, Jamie and Jegan (aka the Biscuit Poets) performing in the Spoken Word tent at the Ejector Seat Festival 2013 (please, please click the link and scroll down as you will see our name in lights - kind of!)

To be honest we have been so busy perfecting our polished performances that we haven't had a chance to write a biscuit poem - though be assured we have eaten plenty of biscuits to keep our energy up.

Please come along and support us at Palmerston Park in Southampton this Saturday 8th June. We are on at 4:45pm straight after Dizraeli who is just about the biggest, most talented performance poet on the scene at the moment - aaaargh, scary) and Luke Wright who is the second biggest and really rather good.

We promise normal biscuit poetry service will be resumed again next week unless we become to big for our boots after our star performance......

Eurovision Sing-o-alla

Singoalla are today's delectation of choice
Swedish biscuits with a Eurovision voice.
Munched in Malmo by the euro conglomeration,
devoured with gusto by every pop nation.

Sing, sing, sing-o-alla
sang the Danes with teardrops in their eyes
as they wowed the crowd
and claimed their Eurovision prize

Oh dastardly Denmark,
victorious you came through,
Poor Bonnie Tyler
only a few believed in you....


Biscuit: Goteborgs Singoalla 

Taste test: 8 out of 10
Cost: A gift from Kristina from Sweden :)

The Biscuitology of Brain Injury

This week is Action for Brain Injury Week. Please show your support for Headway by making a small donation. 

Just click on the Just Giving logo to donate.

Morning Coffee biscuits
are caffeine injections for my voice
propelling me to talk about brain injury
how it changed my life and took away choice

When a bomb goes off in your head
people say "you're lucky you're not dead"
yet with all the turmoil hidden inside
I know, on that day I wish I'd died

The fear and the pain in the eyes of my family
were part and parcel of the unfolding tragedy
the constant confusion of being alive
battled to suffocate my will to survive

Now it's hard to find the right person to love
although I would and could -
but can't
because the whole damn world exists on a slant

The person I am now is simplified
and I feel for once time's on my side
I'm on a journey - no desire to regret
Just tell me please, am I there yet?

Biscuit: Crawford's Morning Coffee

Taste test: 5 out of 10
Cost:  2 for £1 from Poundland in Shirley

Ye Olde Double Choc Chip Biscuits

On a chilly, damp morn in April
Headway set off for Lurgashall Mill.
We journeyed acros downs tirelessly until
beyond the mist laden vale we spied the hill

Home to the Weald and Downland Museum
a great place to spend our £5 per diems.
Bales of hay on which to relax
amidst the dusty, medieval artefacts.

A village lost in time with a ticking past,
its spartan, simple ways here to last.
Volunteers resplendent in yesteryear attire,
baking their flat bread by the vast open fire.

As poets on tour we were straight to the grindstone,
searching for sweet biscuits to set the tone
of our weekly verse inspired by the treats
that were found in the shop surrounded by sweets!

Biscuit: Lurgashall Mill Double Chocolate Chip Biscuits 

Taste test: 8.5 out of 10
Cost:  £2 from Weald & Downland Open Air Museum

Gran Canaria's Guanchitos

To Vicky we say "gracias!"
for bringing us biscuits from Las Palmas
bought on the island of Gran Canaria
a sun drenched, beach blessed volcanic area.

Nestling off the Western Saharan Coast
it was Columbus who loved it the most
in fourteen hundred and ninety two
he anchored there with his steadfast crew

Enroute to discover the United States
Chris disembarked for R&R with ship mates.
No doubt he tasted the local galleta
the Guanchito - once bitten you'll never forget her!

Biscuit: Tirma's Guanchitos

Taste test: 8 out of 10
Cost: A gift from Vicky :)